If your partner:

• Is jealous and possessive toward you, won't let you have friends, checks up on you,won't accept breaking up.
• Tries to control you by being very bossy, giving orders, making all the decisions; doesn't take your opinion seriously.
• Is scary. You worry about how they will react to things you say or do. Threatens you,uses or owns weapons.
• Is violent: has a history of fighting, loses temper quickly. brags about mistreating other.
• Pressures you for sex, is forceful or scary around sex. Thinks women or girls are sex objects. Attempts to manipulate or guilt-trip you by saying "If you really loved me you would....." Gets too serious about the relationship too fast.
• Abuses drugs or alcohol and pressures you to take them.
• Blames you when they mistreat you. Says you provoked them, pressed their buttons, made them do it, led them on.
• Has a history of bad relationships and blames the other person for all the problems. "Women just don't understand me"
• Believes that men should be in control and powerful and that women should be passive and submissive.
• Has hit, pushed, choked, restrained, kicked,or physically abused you.
• Your family and friends have warned you about the person or told you they were worried for you safety.

If your partner matches even two of the choices, you may be in an abusive relationship. Take the time to talk to someone that you can trust about what is going on in your life.
 

• Police Officer
• A member of your family
• A teacher or school counselor
• Your friends or their parents
• Your priest, minister or rabbi
• A doctor or nurse
• People in court- the district attorney or victim witness advocate
• Staff at Tri-County Council or your local battered women's program
• Another adult you trust